Rhoda Schroeder

From Stu Grubb: In case I don't get a chance to see you all in person soon, I wanted to tell you how much Rhoda meant to me and the influence she had on my life. Even if we do have a memorial gathering, it is nice to have these things in writing so they can be shared with others now and in the future. Three occasions particularly come to mind. The first occasion was our now legendary trip to Colorado when we were kids. We all have our fond memories from that trip, and I still have some of Rhoda's wildflower drawings. Rhoda's enthusiasm for seeing, experiencing, and learning about anything and everything in the natural world was infectious. She picked up lots of rocks and told me what they were, based on the one geology course she took in college. I took all those rocks back home, numbered them, and showed them to my friends. I realized some years later that her information was less than 100% accurate, but it did not matter. When I got back from the trip I wanted to learn everything I could about rocks, fossils, and geologic history. That fascination continues to this day. I have an enormous rock collection and a 35-year career as a geologist as a result, both of which make me very happy. Was that all because of Rhoda? Maybe not, but she definitely started the rock rolling downhill. The second occasion was my confirmation when I was 16. Rhoda flew to Minnesota for the weekend, and my grandparents and Uncle Duane came up from Pipestone. I was very touched that Rhoda and others had travelled so far for the occasion. It got me thinking that my church life could be something important. My social life started to shift towards church activities and away from some friends who, in hindsight, were not especially positive influences. I have always been grateful for my ties to the church that were a source of strength, good friends, and good times during my high school and college years. My relationship with Rhoda, and her ties to my Mom, were always something that steered me in that direction. The third occasion was just a brief moment in time, but I will never forget it. I don't recall the year exactly, but I believe it was during Harmony's time at St. Olaf. Your parents and Harmony were visiting us, but I don't think Heather or Holly were there. Someone (probably Grace) had arranged for a Gilmer/Grubb/Schroeder outing on the Apple River. It was a nice day, and we all drove out to Sommerset, Wisconsin. After tubing down the river for a couple of hours we returned to the base camp for a picnic lunch. We got out all the coolers and made sandwiches on the tailgates of our cars. Unfortunately, a group of drunken fratboys had parked next to us. They showed up and started acting like drunken fratboys, being loud and peeing next to the cars. I was livid that they were ruining our family picnic, and in my mind I was thinking of ways of getting them to shut up or leave. I could tell that my Dad and others were starting to get uncomfortable too. I was sitting next to Rhoda when one of the drunks approached her holding a $5 bill and asked "Can I buy one of your sandwiches?" In my mind, that was the last straw. I figured Rhoda would tell this guy to get lost, and I started to get up so I could help her out if he didn't get the message. At most, I thought she would take his money and give him a sandwich just to keep peace. Instead, your Mom smiled at him and said "If you would like a sandwich, I will give you one." She proceeded to make a sandwich and give it to him on a paper plate. He said thank you and went back to his car and his friends. I was shocked. It never even occurred to me to be friendly towards those guys and share our food. It was the right thing to do, certainly far better than whatever confrontation I was heading toward. As I sat back down, I remember thinking that what Rhoda did was the most Christian thing I had ever witnessed. It was love thy neighbor, turn the other cheek, and loaves and fishes all rolled into one. In that moment, she was the kindest, most amazing person I could imagine, and she taught me an invaluable lesson. We were just fortunate that drunk fratboy had approached her and not me. We eventually cut the picnic short and all returned to our house in Hudson to spend the rest of the afternoon together. It wasn't exactly what we planned, but we still had a lot of fun. I see similar circumstances play out all the time, usually from a distance. Somebody or some group has a petty grievance with someone else, which leads to anger, shouting, bad fights, and even lawsuits. It occurs to me that maybe those people never had someone like Rhoda in their lives to model a better way of doing things. I miss your mom; all of us in Minnesota do. Soon the struggles of the last few years will fade from memory and we can think back on the good times. Let's hope we can all get together again soon. Love, Stu