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Gardiens du Mémorial(1)
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Tim Higgins
Rochelle Weirich
30 septembre 1972 - 24 janvier 2022
30 septembre 1972 - 24 janvier 2022
Événements
Créez une page d’événement pour coordonner un rassemblement pour rendre hommage à Rochelle
Hommages
Partagez un souvenir précieux, offrez vos condoléances et rendez hommage à Rochelle avec un message rempli de cœur.
Matt Weirich
A lot of people put in a lot of time to help us get ready for Rochelle's Celebration of Life. And even more people helped us get through these past 5 months. I was very sad. I'm still very sad. But I was never worried. I knew then, and I'm even more confident now, that we would be alright…..because of all of this….because of all of you. We are surrounded by loving, helpful, selfless people, and for that, I give credit to Rochelle. She was the same way. Let's remember her for all those good qualities and all the fun and love she put in our lives, and let's go pay it forward. Let's go be like Rochelle. Thank you. My Tribute to My Beautiful Wife Rochelle and I met in the Fall of 1995 on a jobsite in Fairfax, VA. She chose construction for a career…a field typically reserved for men. But she more than held her own….WAY MORE. She immediately won the hearts of her co-workers with her infectious laugh, her fun-loving spirit, and her incredible work ethic. Her co-workers affectionately called her Rocco. She was an incredibly hard worker and always prepared (but never on time!). I know that had she continued to work a few more years at DAVIS, she would have been their first female Vice President. She was a fighter, she was stubborn, she knew her stuff and didn't back down from anyone…she got that from her dad. I believe it was that toughness, that fighting spirit that allowed her to live with cancer for 10 years. Thank you Rocco, for giving her that fighting spirit. Immediately after her passing, I was flooded with texts, visits, phone calls, and loving posts on Facebook paying tribute to my beautiful Rochelle. I'm sure you've read many of them. There was a common theme in all these messages: Rochelle was selfless. She gave freely and generously of her time, of her friendship, and of her heart. If you needed help, she was there. If you needed to chat, she was there. You always knew that you could depend on Rochelle. And for that, I give credit to her mom. Mary is the same way. She has helped our family so much. She went to every doctor's appointment with Rochelle. She wrote down and researched every drug and its side effects so she could prepare Rochelle for what to expect. She stayed in the hospital the entire time with Rochelle, and for that I am so very, very thankful. Heaven may have gained an angel with Rochelle, but we still have one here on earth. Rochelle loved to entertain. She always wanted our house to be the host house. New Year's Eve dinners with our friends?.... our house. The tailgating before the tailgating before the concert?....our house. Halloween party?....our house. Ugly sweater party? Our house. She loved that Ugly Sweater party, and so did our friends. She was very creative and always had a brilliant idea for an ugly sweater or Halloween costume. One year, we went as Michelangelo and the statue of David. Then JFK and Marilyn Monroe (I was Marilyn…). And of course she was so involved with the kids' costumes, whether it be a flight attendant or Sally from the Nightmare Before Christmas. One year, she made Tyler's red wagon into the Big Red Car from the Wiggles so he could partake in the trick-or treating. Another year, she strapped a crate to the front of his bike, put Tyler in a red sweatshirt, put a stuffed ET doll in the crate and presto, Tyler was Elliott helping ET get back home. She was so creative, so fun-loving. Rochelle loved to compete, at anything. People would always tease me about how competitive I was, but little did they know that I was the 2nd most competitive person in our household! Cards, board games, tennis, pickleball…you name it she wanted to play it. She loved game night with family and friends. She loved playing cards at Thanksgiving at Aunt Nancy's. She loved playing Heads Up at Mary Angela and EJ's at Christmas. And she loved to gamble. She got that from Ma Mary. When Maryland LIVE opened, she and her friends went on opening night. She got a gawdy satin jacket and obnoxious hat for attending opening night. She and the girls would frequent that establishment many times, always coming back a little poorer in the pocket, but a little richer in life. Rochelle loved the water, a passion instilled in her very early in life due to her many weekends on the Bay. One of the first pictures she shared with me was of her in her little bassinet on the back of Rocco's boat. She loved going for rides on the boat, sitting on the bow with the air blowing through her hair. When we met and started dating, I got to share in these experiences. Together we visited all of these quaint little towns on the Bay that I would never have gotten the chance to experience, and for that I will be forever grateful. But the thing that Rochelle loved the most was family. Family was everything to her. She loved having Sunday dinners at our house with her mom, dad, and brother. She loved going to Annapolis and taking boat rides with them. She loved the holidays and visiting with my parents and family, as well as her own. And she absolutely and unconditionally loved our children. She was Tyler's biggest advocate, fighting to get him the best services and care. She saw things in him that others didn't. When it came time to decide on a school, she pushed to put him in the normal school and not one for special needs children. She saw that he was very social and needed that interaction with others. She wanted him to be challenged. She was right, of course, and I credit her for Tyler's ability to talk and interact so well with others (especially the ladies!). And Gracie…you are everything to Mom. There is nothing, NOTHING she loved more than being your mom. She loved watching you dance. She loved taking you to all your competitions. She loved watching you grow into the beautiful young lady that you are today, and she will continue to watch you grow from Heaven. Six days after Mom passed, you and your Poms Team had a competition. The title of the song was "In Case You Don't Live Forever" and the lyrics are so appropriate to your relationship with Mom. "You put all your faith in my dreams, You gave me the world that I wanted What did I do to deserve you? I follow your steps with my feet I walk on the road that you started I need you to know that I heard you, every word In case you don't live forever, let me tell you now I love you more than you'll ever wrap your head around In case you don't live forever, let me tell you the truth, I'm everything that I am because of you." Mom put every piece of her into you. She got you off to a great start, and now it's up to you to continue your journey and make her proud, and I know you will. She was always so proud of you, and so am I. For Christmas this past year, Rochelle got a gift of inspirational socks from one of her good friends. There were 4 pair in the box. One said Strong, one said Brave, one said Confident. But the 4th pair was missing. I looked on the front of the box and saw that the 4th pair said Courageous. She was wearing them. She was wearing them to her scan that she got every couple of months to see if the cancer was growing. Courageous…. how fitting. How else do you describe someone who battles cancer as if nothing was wrong. How else do you describe someone who gets up every morning to take care of her family, to volunteer at the school, to shuttle her kids back and forth to dance practice, physical therapy, and weekend competitions. Cancer didn't slow Rochelle down one bit. Stuart Scott said in his ESPY speech, "When you die, it does not mean that you lose to cancer. You beat cancer by how you live, why you live, and in the manner in which you live." Rochelle completely embodied those words. Early in her diagnosis, Rochelle went to visit a priest for words of comfort. The priest showed her a picture of a tombstone and asked her "What's the most important part about this picture?" Rochelle shook her head, not knowing where he was going. "It's the hyphen. For you see, it is not important when you were born, or when you die. What is most important, is what you do with the time in between." Rochelle was a beautiful person. She was loved by so many. She made the most of the time she was given. She was my hero, and we will all miss her tremendously. I will love you forever, honey. May God Bless you. Rest in Peace.
Mary-Angela Kenney
It was wonderful to meet Rochelle's friends and hear about her impact on all of them. Below is what I spoke in her honor. Love, Mary- Angela I am Rochelle's first cousin. Mary Gay is my godmother and Rocco is my godson. Rochelle and I had a lot in common and we shared a lot of fun memories together. She was in my wedding, and my children were in hers. We were the first generation to NOT marry an Italian. They are both easy going guys, who allowed us to take the lead (and control )of the household, and all of the activities, projects, parties, and events. We both are driven, competitive in nature, and pursued what is typically male dominated careers. We love shopping and traveling and hosting parties and family gatherings. And we both have a strong commitment to our family and truly enjoy creating wonderful memories. One of my favorite memories with Rochelle were the annual Christmas gatherings at our house in PA. We've had over 10 years of getting together for a food fest of meat, fish, and pasta, a lot of laughter, competitive games and lively conversation.. Rochelle, Aunt Mary Gay, and I would work for weeks on a date and time. But I always knew the ‘time' was a variable (+/- 1 hour) or so.. The games were very competitive, and Gracie, along with my daughter, Olivia usually won, representing the girls team. Tyler always fiercely cheering for the girls, of course. The other detail that her and I discussed, and not a lot of people knew, was a strategy to avoid political conversations between our fathers. They are on opposite sides of the aisle, to say the least. In an Italian family, debate is the primary form of conversation, and most of us grew up that way. But often, there were boyfriends, girlfriends of family members that may not appreciate the intensity, so Rochelle and I would try to time the ‘game playing' when we knew the conversation was beginning. We also tried seating arrangements as well. Neither were successful and we would laugh about it afterwards. Rochelle had the best laugh. There is no question our time with Rochelle has been cut way too short and there were more stories to be made for sure, but we both loved getting pictures of those memories and we will continue to laugh and remember those days together forever. She will be missed, but knowing her, she will always be a very active spirit in all of us.
Alisha Rovner
It was wonderful to be with so many people yesterday who loved Rochelle just like I did. Below are the remarks that I was so honored to share at her beautiful celebration of life. Good afternoon. It is such an honor and blessing for us to be together and remember and celebrate a truly outstanding person. Matt, Gracie, Tyler, Mary, Rocco and Rocco, thank you so much for inviting me to share some of my own beautiful memories of my dear friend Rochelle. For those of you who don't know me, I am Alisha Rovner. Along with my husband Oren, I have had the good fortune of living next to the Weirichs for the last 15 years. To me, Rochelle started off as a kind next-door neighbor; and over the years she turned into a close friend and confidant of mine. I admired her so much for her strength, optimistic outlook and phenomenal sense of humor. When I first moved to Maple Lawn from Baltimore city, I knew no one in Howard county. I was concerned that it would be difficult to meet friends because I didn't have kids yet. I have a vivid memory of the first time I met Rochelle: she was pulling 2-year-old Grace and Tyler in a bright red wagon. As a twin myself, I am always immediately drawn to everything twin-related, so I started talking to Rochelle. She was so welcoming and upbeat. From then on I saw Rochelle a bit as a role model: she as a young mother raising kids-- twins no less-- with joy and poise gave me confidence to raise a family as well; I now have 2 children of my own. It is so important for women to have mentors, and Rochelle taught me that my mentors may come not only from professional life or from family but also from community and friends. Rochelle was always so kind and considerate to me. One time Rochelle saw me outside my house crying because I had house guests who were stressing me out. Rochelle called me over to her porch to see if I was ok and offer me wine. How she knew wine was my guilty pleasure, I don't know; but maybe it is a secret of young mothers I shouldn't be sharing with the world at large. Rochelle did share, and that connection to her that she offered me was so valuable. If I had been her, I may have run inside and totally avoided a crazy neighbor bawling into the wind; but in typical Rochelle-fashion she offered a lending hand and a compassionate ear. That afternoon was the first of our periodic wine chats, which years later moved to her patio and continued until just a few months before she passed. I absolutely cherished those talks. Amongst other topics, I often would seek out her advice about raising children and what to expect during certain stages, and she always provided sage and outstanding advice. She had a wisdom about her, a clear way of thinking about things, that was reassuring and thoughtful. Rochelle also had a kind but keen sense of humor. In our patio chats, Rochelle and our other dear friend, Jenny Kim, often laughed at me because by about 9:30 pm I was yawning and ready for bed while they could sit out there for many more hours. That was just one of the many things Rochelle would tease me about: Rochelle joked about my obsession with Ben Platt and President Biden and especially about my absolutely horrific parking jobs outside our house. Rochelle's house and mine are located on the outer part of a curve, and I don't always get quite close enough to the curb. The day before Rochelle passed Matt had to text me tell me that my car once again was in an unsafe position. I took a picture of my ridiculous parking job and texted Rochelle, then in the hospital; I wrote, "Another excellent parking job. Matt is filling in until you're home to let me know I need to repark my car." I often look at that text and get a good laugh-as well as cry. Rochelle and I both have had a love of theatre and comedy. We spent hours making plans about what shows we would go see together. About 5 years ago Rochelle, Jenny Kim, and I arranged to see the drama American Son in New York City. Rochelle had only ever seen musicals when going to Broadway but was nevertheless so easy-going and up for anything, so she joined us even though she had no idea the play was about an extremely heavy topic. Rochelle absolutely loved the play, but from that day on she would tease me any time I wanted to go see a show with her because she was afraid to hear what the topic of the show might be. The last night I personally spent with Rochelle was last November when she took me and her mom to see a comedian at the Lyric Theater in Baltimore. The comic, Sebastian Maniscalco, has a very American-Italian themed routine; Rochelle and I shared those ethnic roots and could relate and laugh together. Initially I had been concerned about going because of the rise in COVID cases in the community; but we hadn't been out in so long, and I welcomed the opportunity to spend the night with Rochelle and her mom since Rochelle felt comfortable with the plan. As we waited in line outside the Lyric, the guy behind me started to pick a fight by telling me he was offended because I was wearing a mask. As I became more and more upset, Rochelle calmly suggested to me that we move to a different line. It took all that I had to control my New Jersey-Italian ways, but I listened to Rochelle, kept my big mouth closed and followed her. This is a perfect illustration of what a peacemaker Rochelle was. Despite the rocky beginning to the evening, Rochelle got me over the negative feelings; and we got non-stop laughs the rest of that night. Rochelle's ability to put aside negativity and focus on the positive was wonderful. The day after Rochelle passed, I told Matt that he has many women who are here for him and his family for the long haul. I said to him there are probably 20 women who want to provide our help and support; yet even with that number we could never do everything that Rochelle was able to do. Despite battling an illness, she outperformed 20 of us! She was truly an inspirational woman who let nothing get in her way. Thank you to the Weirich family for sharing Rochelle with us. We loved her, we are better for knowing her, and we will continue to be there for your family.
Matt Weirich
Thank you to Joe Leary for creating this beautiful video tribute to Rochelle. Thank you to all who shared pictures, adventures and love for her. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1kHs4zUAj4
Kelly Cullinan
Below are the joint remarks that Bridget and I made at Rochelle's beautiful memorial service. Kelly: Rochelle and I met in Washington DC our freshman year of college and we were quite quickly inseparable. We both studied architecture and lived on the same floor of Spellman Hall back in 1990. Thirty years ago but it can still seem like yesterday. The memories are often of mundane and fleeting moments - hanging out in the hallway outside Rochelle's dorm room, trekking over to the dining hall to eat, driving around in the car - Rochelle drove a gray Opal in college - which made a lot of sense when we meet Mr. Falvello, AKA "Rocco". I have so many memories of all our friends packing into "The Opal". She loved it but was relieved when she got a new car the summer before our senior year. "It's smaller, thank god." I remember her writing me. There were spring breaks in FL - three years straight if I remember right. The first year we went to stay with my grandmother in Clearwater, FL. My grandmother went down every winter and stayed in a condo with her two sister and her cousin, my Uncle Nick. Uncle Nick was very old school and kept telling my grandmother that Rochelle and I couldn't go out by ourselves that she needed to be our chaperon. I can still remember her saying Nicky people don't do that anymore and she'd wave at Rochelle and I to scoot out the door while he wasn't paying attention. The next year we drove to the Pensacola, FL to visit our friend's brother. Rochelle and I got on stage with the band for an epic duet at the Flora - Bama, a dive bar on the beach straddling the border between Florida and Alabama. Oh man, what a night. SMH! We were just kids. Bridget: We were just kids. I came into the picture a couple years later. Heading into our Junior year at Catholic, my housing plans had fallen through, and I was looking for someone (anyone) to move off campus with. I didn't really know Kelly or Rochelle or their third roommate Roberta very well. And they certainly didn't know me. I was a nursing major, and they were all architecture students at the time. I guess we all took a chance and what followed proved to truly be one of the biggest blessings in my life. Rochelle took the biggest risk, agreeing to be the direct roommate of the unknown variable girl. I think she would agree it was a risk worth taking, as we wound up sharing a room for the next three years. It did take some time to really get to know each other. I remember I used to set my clock radio alarm to the local country music station. Rochelle and I had probably been living together for close to a year when she said, "Wait, wait, wait, wait. You LIKE country music?? I thought you just set your alarm to it so you would leap out of bed to shut it off! You know, so you would never oversleep!" She laughed. She made that face with those Rochelle eyes. But I'd like to believe over time I rubbed off on her a little, as I know she eventually took in a show or two at The Grand Ole Opry. Kelly: When I moved away from Washington DC in 2003, Rochelle was already inside my head, she was a part of me, part of who I was. Her friendship made me who I am today and I'm all the better for it. After moving away I came back to visit a handful of times but I must say the lion's share of visits were from Rochelle coming up to NYC. One of the visits that stands out the most in my head was her visit for the NYC marathon. One of her friends was running in the marathon and she was excited to cheer her on. I don't have much time so I'll leave it at this - a blowup doll that Rochelle dressed to look like a marathon runner cheering through a megaphone and Rochelle and I carrying it on and off the subway through Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx and Manhattan. It is not easy to navigate the NYC subway system on a good day, but on marathon day forget it. Stations are closed, entranced are blocked and it feels like the entire city is packing onto one trains BUT off we went - blowup doll in tow - happily obliging the main requests for photos from laughing on lookers. Bridget: Kelly is right. We had a lot of fun together. We always did. I think it's pretty widely accepted that it was hard to be around Rochelle and not have a good time. We had boating outings with her parents, and there was that spring break in Key West. So, the rest of the senior class stayed in fancy hotels and condos but we stayed in tents in a family campground. It was absurd! But we had a blast, even if we met every morning baking under the Florida sun in those tents, praying that the least hungover of us would get to the zipper in time to let in some air and save us all. Those trips morphed into family vacations with the kids to Sesame Place and couples' getaways to Jamaica. And I have a quick NYC subway story to share, too. A few years ago Rochelle and I were supposed to meet Kelly in the city to meet her new baby. Roche was taking the train up from MD and I was taking the train down from CT. We coordinated our arrival times and we were supposed to meet up at the main train station and then take the subway together to meet up with Kelly. As we were both arriving with an, "I'm here. Where are you?" "Umm, I'm here. Where are you?" it dawned on us that Rochelle's train had arrived at Penn Station and mine had arrived at Grand Central. Classic. Now I had counted on Rochelle to help me navigate the subway (given all of her previous experience with the blow-up doll). And I will be honest, I was a little bit lost without her. Kelly: As I prepared to speak to you all today I felt the magnitude of our collective lose and what I still haven't been able to fully grieve. The kind of grieving that comes more slowly one day at a time, sometimes so unexpected as you go about your work. When Rochelle passed in January, I had a hard time accepting it. How could our beautiful Rochelle not be with us? And it felt awful. I couldn't fully grieve yet, I wasn't ready to acknowledge the finality of this loss. I started to judge myself and worry - was I a good enough friend, did I show up for Rochelle, I thought about what I regretted - I thought about the unfinished aspects of our relationship. The things that would remain unfinished. And I knew that Rochelle would say forgive yourself. 100% forgive yourself. And with that forgiving, comes compassion for myself and for others. Bridget: That is beautiful, Kelly. And on the topic of beautiful things, we wanted to acknowledge Matt and Rochelle as a couple. We knew Matt was something special to Rochelle when he first bounded on the scene. The first we heard of him he had shoveled her driveway out of the snow, unsolicited. We were like, "Wow. Who is this guy?" And to our great good fortune we found out just the man Matt is, as a person, as a friend, as a father, and as the incredible love of Rochelle's life. Matt, together you and Rochelle built a wonderful life. You two had a ridiculous amount of fun. Your Halloween costumes? Couple's goals, right there! You faced more than your fair share of challenges, from the scary reality of raising preemie twins to Rochelle's illnesses. Neither of you ever focused on the negative. The pride you shared in your children and their respective strengths has always been obvious to everyone…Tyler's love of music, the joy he brings to…everyone…and Gracie's talent for dance, only trumped by her empathy and kindness, are just a couple examples of why you and Rochelle should be incredibly proud of the life you shared. I am just going to touch upon one last thing before Kelly closes our collective thoughts here. As boisterous and fun-loving as Rochelle was, she was also incredibly private and stoic about her illness. She barely spoke of it. If we asked, she would offer a couple sentences of an update and then turn the conversation back to us. The last text exchange I had with Rochelle, I told her I had talked to Kelly and I knew that she was going through a really difficult time. I told her I knew she was a private person but that I was here if she needed to talk. She suggested a Zoom call with the three of us the following week, and in true Rochelle style, said that I could update her on my boys, completely shifting the focus away from herself. But that's what she wanted and that's who she was. She just wanted to live her life. She loved her life and all of the people in it. We loved her, too. Kelly: Be gentle and tender with yourselves as you grieve. It's ok not to be ok right now. In time we'll all feel the pure grief of the reality that Rochelle, in form is no longer here - I'm still very much working on accepting this reality, but I'm holding that grief and meeting that grief with compassion. And in sometime my hope is that we can just grieve what we loved about Rochelle and then have the grief dissolve into just loving. Embedded in grief is love. It's a loving presents not tied to time and space. I feel the grief and the loss and then the loving that nothing can remove. I'd like to end with an excerpt of a poem by John O'Donohue: "Though we need to weep your loss, You dwell in that safe place in our hearts, Where no storm or night or pain can reach you Let us not look for you only in memory, Where we would grow lonely without you. You would want us to find you in presence. Beside us when beauty brightens, When kindness glows And music echoes eternal tones." I know Rochelle is beside us today on this beautiful afternoon.
Nikki Munro
Just over four years ago, two four-foot 11 incoming freshman tried out and made the Our Lady of Good Counsel Pom and Dance Team. Just over four years ago these two, Abby and Grace, became best friends. Rochelle and I, and Matt and Brian followed, falling into the kind of friendship that usually takes years to build. From our first dinner at River Hill Grill during the freshman homecoming dance to our last dinner at Bushel and Peck celebrating Brian and Rochelle's 49th birthdays, we watched our baby girls grow into strong young women each of us treating both girls like they were our own and sharing a beautiful friendship and love that transcends the death of our partners. Over the last four years, Rochelle and I spoke every day. Who am I kidding, we spoke at least once a day and texted 20 times a day. We spent so many days and nights together laughing, worrying, planning parties and tailgates, fundraising, volunteering, carpooling, encouraging Abby and Grace, and supporting each other as moms and friends. Rochelle was the kind of friend you could call in the middle of the day or middle of the night laughing or crying, the kind of volunteer you could always count on to do her job and the jobs of 5 others, and the kind of parent who loved your children like her own. She never wanted to be center stage, but always made sure that everybody had fun, was well fed, and felt happy in her presence. She always pushed Grace and Abby to step out of their comfort zones and to be the best they could be. Rochelle and I planned a lot of parties at my house. For each party, she was responsible for decorations, because what I lack in creativity, she had 10-fold. She always brought balloons with confetti in them. The balloons would inevitably pop and the gold and silver confetti would go everywhere. Each time Rochelle would show up with confetti balloons, Brian would shake his head, laugh, and tell her no more balloons. She would ignore him, bring the balloons anyway, and we'd pick up confetti from our yard and house for months (now years) following. Last September, I mentioned on a group text with Brian, Matt, Rochelle and me, that I still had her silver sparkly tablecloths from our prior year's pandemic fake homecoming or "FoCo" as the kids called it. She responded "Ha! We may need those again. And I have the perfect balloon to compliment the tablecloths….following the text up with a laughing smiley face." Brian laughed out loud in our kitchen and simply responded "No balloons from you please!" Just last Thursday, exactly 8 months after Brian died, and as we were getting ready for the girls graduation party, I found two confetti circles and I knew Rochelle and Brian were there with us. With each confetti circle that I continue to find, I remember Rochelle and Brian's love of parties, of life, their family and others and I am grateful. I am grateful for the late nights by the fire that we sat up and talked about or with our girls. I am grateful for her laugh, her brutal honesty, and the crazy fun we had. I am grateful she taught me how to be a dance mom - since I knew next to nothing, it took a lot of effort on her part. I am grateful for our trips to the beach and Disney. I am grateful for the last dance party we had at the end of December in my living room when we introduced Grace to Footloose. I am grateful we shared parenting these two beautiful young women. I'm so grateful for Rochelle's support in my darkest hours, even when she was struggling herself. I remember sitting on the ground in the middle of my backyard at the end of November crying. She pulled into my driveway as if she knew I needed her, picked me up off the ground, and kept me from falling apart. For all her goodness, I am most grateful for the four years I got to love her and be her friend. Rochelle was one of the strongest women I've ever known. She never wanted to be the mom or friend with cancer. Instead, she chose to live, to always be the best she could be, to stay up late, to plan and be the last to leave a party, to laugh, to love fiercely, and to move forward each day without regard for herself or her problems, but selflessly loving and doing for her family and others. Rochelle you were my best new friend and you'll always be my favorite and forever pom mom. I am truly a better person for having known you and loved you. I will remember you, love you, and miss you so much, always. You and Brian keep the tailgate going until we get there.
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