Stephanie Diane Vacca

It is with heavy hearts that we announce the passing of Stephanie Diane Vacca aka “Duchess”, who departed from this world far too soon on September 6, 2023. She was born on May 24, 1988 in Escondido, CA to her loving parents Kathy Dutton and Lance Bernstine.

Stephanie’s magnetic personality drew friends from every corner of the world. She had an uncanny ability to make everyone feel welcome and valued, and she forged deep connections wherever she went. Her circle of friends was vast and diverse, a testament to her ability to make deep connections. She cherished these bonds and was always there to support, celebrate, and uplift her friends.

Family was important to Stephanie, no matter where life took her, she understood the importance of connection. From a young age she embraced relationships with her cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents. She followed in her family’s footsteps and found a love for cars, participating in car shows with her Nova or getting her hands dirty working on restoring her late husband’s Evo. Her look on life was infectious, ever encouraging and always looking out for those she loved.

Her adventurous spirit knew no bounds. Whether it was weekends off-roading in the desert, attending car shows and races, enjoying a bit of “wind therapy” on a ride with her partner Billy or embarking on spontaneous road trips with friends or family, adventure always found her. Her favorite times were making memories with all those she loved.

Stephanie is preceded in death by her husband Charles Vacca, brother Ross Bernstine, and her grandfather Terry Dutton. Left to cherish her memory are her mother Kathy De La Rosa, father Lance Bernstine, step-father Richard De La Rosa, grandmother Dian Dutton, best-friend of over twenty years Samantha Daggett, her partner Billy Kehle, many aunts, uncles, cousins and all the friends she added to her family.

Though she has left this world, Stephanie’s’ light will continue to shine brightly through the memories we hold dear. May we honor her memory by embracing life with the same enthusiasm, love, and compassion that she shared with us.

Rest in peace, Stephanie, you will forever be missed. Your life and legacy will not soon be forgotten

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In her own words:

About Stephanie

I have an amazing imagination & I run wild with it. Im the kind of person you can talk to about anything & everything. I am different & if you know me, you know that already. I've got real good people in my life. I hope you can say the same, & I hope i'm one of those people to you. Happiness is not an option! It's a requirement round here! Laughter is the best medicine. So is a good hug. I enjoy the little itty bitty things in life. Like a home cooked meal... MMM There is very little need to impress me. I won't look you up and down, or judge your beliefs. Who am I, or the next guy to judge anyone, right? At my worst, I'm a little reckless and not as responsible as I should be. At my best, I'm giving it my all to whatever it is I'm doing. Ideally, I'd love to be that face you always remember, and a voice you'll never forget. I’ve learned to be careful who you fall in love with and the importance of being a good judge of character. I’ve learned that if the dots aren’t connecting and something seems sketchy, to trust your instincts. That the only thing worth fearing is fear itself for fear gets in the way of living the life you’ve always dreamed for yourself; it's better to seize your dreams than surrender them to an intangible mental concept and live your life wondering, what if?” I realize it’s less important to have a lot of friends and more important to have real ones. I can make reality better than a fairytale through hard work,self-respect, honesty and a whole lot of love. I’ve learned the importance of being practical and knowing limits, but have come to understand the danger in underestimating the power of dreaming. I’ve learned that money is fluid and it streams in and out of our lives like water dripping through our hands. We can use it to better our mission or to destroy our souls, either way we aren’t taking any of it to our graves so be aware of the impact it has on your spirit. I am a strong believer in Karma. The old adage that what goes around comes around rings very true to me. In my opinion you attract what you give out. I hope to attract good Karma; I believe in treating people the way I want to be treated. I would not want to be stolen from, so I won't steal from you. I don't want you to be mean to me, so I won't be mean to you, but it goes much deeper than that. I believe the universe keeps track of our deeds, somehow. Some people believe God keeps a running record of our good and bad deeds; I'm not here to preach, but I think somehow the universe, or God, or whatever higher power you believe in keeps some sort of record, because the law of averages always catches up with us.

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Donations made in Memory of Stephanie can be made to Roses for Veterans Roses for Veterans blossomed from Stephanie's desire to honor her husband and all that served. With the talent and dedication of Jenelle Nino the project has  blossomed and will continue to honor her memory.