Sonja Marriott Taylor

Remembering my Mom These are some of the aspects of my Mom's life I presented to a remembrance in White Rock, Saturday, 11 April 2026 Family Created a big family Five children, their spouses, and seven grandchildren An only child, so turned friends like Gail Smythe and Betty Stewart into family – their families were our aunties and uncles. Food chief cook and bottle washer Taught proper British manners (fork and knife, how to eat soup, elbows) Scalloped potatoes, Yorkshire pudding, either in a pan or in individual muffin pan, filled with gravy, roast beef, Chinese food in a wok, spaghetti and meatballs, dumplings in stew, chicken cacciatore, massive Thanksgiving and Christmas and Easter meals Special occasions cakes: cut, shaped, iced and decorated for Easter or for a birthday. Lazy Daisy sponge cake. Chocolate cake, cheesecake, Nanaimo bars, baked Alaska, custards, pineapple upside down cake, pies, peanut butter cookies with the imprint of fork tines, lumps of chewy coconut mounds on wax paper in the fridge, strawberry-rhubarb jam kept in the freezer, French toast Not so great: cheese sandwiches with tomato slices that I would open at school and find to be soaking wet; liver; brussels sprouts Frugal McDonald’s -- one 18 cent hamburger each. Made clothing for herself and for her children at times. Sometimes clothing passed down from one child to the next All her children became familiar with the low prices at Army & Navy, Woodward's, Hamilton Harvey, Hi-Lo Music - singing, piano, dance singing A sweet, strong singing voice. Sang with the Elgar Choir of British Columbia, travelled to England with the choir. Met Dad in Princeton in a musical. On trips in the car, we sang songs. If we sang “You can’t get to heaven”, everyone was expected to come up with a rhyming verse. “In a submarine; ‘cause you’ll cruise right by, sight unseen”. “in a hot air balloon; ‘cause you’ll arrive – way too soon.” It’s a long way to Tiperaree. Blue Moon. piano Mom had learned how to play a few songs by heart. She didn’t learn any new ones as far as I know. She taught all of us “Chopsticks” and “Blue Moon” on the piano. dance Could do ballet moves and named them – plie Mom & Dad were good dancers [If her children or grandchildren were into other forms of creative expression (comics, rock & roll, manga) she wasn’t impressed.] Personality Very generous New friends or members of the family, felt very welcome. Bought thoughtful, sometimes whimsical, gifts for each person. Even in our early frugal times, we’d have a treat – Chinese food in Chinatown; a dipped cone at Dairy Queen; eat out at A&W or White Spot; fish and chips at Kitsilano beach. Once she had her driver’s licence, took kids to lessons, didn’t matter how many there were in a week. Taught all of us to buy gifts for others, even if inexpensive and small things from Chinatown like a fan or a flute. Very expressive broadcast her feelings; blunt, let it out If on the rare occasion we did do something she approved of, she gave generous praise. (We weren’t noted by our helping around the house.) Could get really angry. Once had Beetle in wrong gear (went in reverse and hit other car). Lots of loud arguing when I was growing up with her Dad. You always knew if she was frustrated, or if you weren’t moving fast enough to get ready Tell me about everyone else. About Dad: “The lawn mower has been outside for five months.” Self-esteem issues. We'd hear: “I feel so guilty”. “I’m not worth it.” “I’m not a good cook.” Very strong-willed, very determined, if there was a difficulty she pushed onward, did not give up. She had no time for stupidity or whining or second-guessing. Just get on with it. Lots of talking A great story-teller. A very cheery, melodious voice Malapropisms (Macadamia)Macnamara nuts, chick peas = chuck peas Unique expressions: You won’t amount to a hill of shooks. Don’t be a twit. Silly duck. The only way to tell her something in a conversation was to interrupt her: could talk nonstop for at least an hour. When I was living at home, and in the first years I lived on my own, heard a lot of complaints and grievances. Through the great-aunts, the sisters of Grandpa Jakobsen (great aunts and uncle, Byddy, Elizabeth and William all lived together in a house in Kitsilano and ran a bakery on Broadway), we learned the Danish word “bestafa” She would tell strangers all about the accomplishments of her children. Worked very hard – for much of her life, she was always very busy High energy level – taught full-time, completed a degree, cared for five children and a husband Built three houses: 145A St, New McLellan Rd (Panorama Ridge), Columbia Ave in WRock Walked quickly, with purpose. Even on a walker, she moved fast. Children also had to be doing things: piano lessons, dance lessons, swimming lessons, summer camp Did a lot of travelling with all the children camping in BC, Okanagan, Washington State, Oregon Spain, Mexico, Hawaii, Thetis Island with Dad China, Egypt, Spain, England, Mexico, Hawaii as Grandma and as Mom New York City, Toronto, San Diego, New Jersey, London Superbly effective Grade One teacher All the children could read by the end of grade one; some read at a grade 2 level, some read at a grade 3 level. Used every method imaginable (phonics, rebuses, etc) normal school out of high school, and with one year training, she was in the classroom Went back to school (SFU) and got a degree. For a while she was a ‘helping teacher’, teaching other teachers. After being a helping teacher for a while, she preferred to go back into a classroom and teach children, not adults Never stopped learning Very curious about the natural world. Took marine biology courses at SFU Docent at the Vancouver Aquarium. We got to go in the back. We drove into the New Westminster Public Library regularly to each get a stack of books. She loved to read books by Gerald Durrell (My Family and Other Animals); All Things Bright and Beautiful series. Spiritual Life Anglican church. Baptized some of us. Keats Baptist Camp (told me in 2021 she went four times) At least at Easter and Christmas, we'd sing “Thank you for the food we eat, Thank you for the birds that sing. Thank you God for everything”. 2016: About what the Anglican pastor says in his sermons, “I don’t swallow everything they say.” Later Years Mellowed Out, and then Fading Memory She expressed her concern and caring as things she did for others. She didn’t express her love openly in hugs and patiently listening to her children. She became much more expressive around the time she started having grandchildren. For most of her life there was just one right way to do everything. As Mom got older, she became an optimist. Used to hear a lot of complaints and grievances. Then she became someone to give encouragement and support. Then she began to forget. Her memory seemed to fade backwards. The most recent 20 or 30 years faded first. Then the memories from 40 to 50 years ago. Her last vivid memories were of her first year of teaching. No more resentments, no more complaints about relatives. “I’m a fat cat.” What she taught me To be honest. To be very moral, be very alert to nonsense. To be curious, and skeptical of tall tales. How to print 1940s style a and g How to tie my shoelaces left-handed