Peter Antanas Jeske

1. Peter's Special Gift. The American poet, Maya Angelou, famously said: "I've learned that people will forget what you said.…people will forget what you did...but people will never forget how you made them feel." In the week and a half since we lost Peter, Indre and I have been blessed to hear from so many of our family and friends, and from so many of Peter's large network of friends. And, so many of those people have shared a story about Peter, or to told us about some time they spent with Peter, or how Peter made them smile or laugh. Indre and I have absolutely treasured all of those stories. So, as I thought about what I wanted to tell all of you about our beautiful son, Peter, it occurred to me that the common theme in all of those stories and experiences that we were hearing was how Peter made them feel. And, I realized this was Peter's special gift…his special gift was that he always tried make everyone around him feel better…to feel welcomed…to make them smile or laugh. What a gift.…what an amazing gift to be able to make your friends laugh…to make them feel special and included……and, sometimes, to be the one that reached out to a friend who may have strayed from the group to try to bring them back and make them feel welcome.Peter's Smile and Sense of Humor ("Corn Fans") Now, Pete had some great tools in his toolkit to help him with that special gift. He relied on that infectious smile that could light up a room…that could put everyone at ease. If you've visited Peter's Tribute page and seen the picture we posted there of Peter…that's the smile I'm talking about. Peter also used his sense of humor.sometimes goofy…sometimes quirky…sometimes incredibly smart and clever. The truth is that Peter saw the world a little bit differently than most of us. As Indre, Matt, Alex, and I were heading down to IU in Bloomington last week to see Peter for the first time since he had passed and to bring him back home, I remember driving south on I-65. As those of you who have made that drive know, there is a large stretch of farmland that is littered with those giant, electricity-generating windmills as far as you can see. As we were driving through that stretch, it reminded me of Peter tweeting a few years ago about those windmills and concluding that, to him, they really just looked like "Corn Fans." As somber as that drive was down to Bloomington…there was Peter…in my ear…making me laugh.and making me feel just a tiny bit better. By the way, the next time you're driving through some farm country in the Midwest and you see a field full of those windmills and think to yourself "huh…Corn Fans" (and you will)...just look up and give a little nod to Pete.Ill. Father John: Peter's Voice This past weekend, Father John was gracious enough to come to our home and visit with Indre and me. As we talked, Father John said something that really resonated with me. I won't get it exactly right, but the sentiment was that, while Peter has left this earth…he isn't gone…he still has a voice…he still has something to say to all of us. From almost the first moment that I learned that Peter had passed, I knew that I was going to be talking to all of you like I am now. And, I knew that it was going to be the most important thing I had ever done…to try to give a voice to our beautiful Peter. As I've been reflecting on what I wanted to say, I looked back at a passage that I had read at the funeral services for both my father and then my mother. This passage was something that I found comforting at the time. So, I found the passage and reread it. As I was reading the passage, it hit me that it was exactly what Peter would be saying to us. This is what Peter... with his special gift of trying to make everyone around him feel better.… would want to say to all of us. So, I'm going to read this passage to you… and as I do I would invite you to close your eyes and imagine Peter's voice.All Is Well Death is nothing at all, I have only slipped into the next room I am I and you are you Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by my old familiar name, Speak to me in the easy way which you always used Put no difference in your tone, Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was, Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, Just around the corner. All is well.Indre… you are the best Mom Peter ever could have asked for and he absolutely adored you. Matt & Alex… you are both fantastic big brothers and Peter loved and idolized you both. We're all going to miss Peter...we're going to miss his beautiful smile…his quirky sense of humor……the bright light that he brought to our lives. So, when you find yourself missing him. of you…tomorrow…next week…next year. you may forget exactly what he said… you may even forget some of the things he did...but, please, always remember the way Peter made you feel. I love you Pete.